Tuesday, July 18, 2017

When I am gone

 “Alas, poor Yorick! I knew him, Horatio: a fellow
of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy: he hath
borne me on his back a thousand times; and now, how
abhorred in my imagination it is! my gorge rims at
it. Here hung those lips that I have kissed I know
not how oft. Where be your gibes now? your
gambols? your songs? your flashes of merriment,
that were wont to set the table on a roar? Not one
now, to mock your own grinning? quite chap-fallen?”

William Shakespeare

When I am dead and gone no one will remember me.  Human lives are almost all simply dust in the cosmic dust cloud.  We will not linger in memory or living world.  Nothing will remain... except for the gifts we give our children. 

Now, about the children.  We are made from a collision between sperm and egg, by two humans.  I didn't say love.  I didn't even say lust.  We happen in creation due to sperm and egg.  So growing up some of us become aware that we are not born of love but only lust.  We become born of love but our parents were not together before or after.  We become born of boredom.  We become born because sperm met egg, nothing special.  Our lives are special only for what we do with them.

And for our children... we grew up, and we chose to make a family. Our children can be special.  We are the ones who make that happen.  So when I am dead, the wisdom I've gained in life and shared with my son will help him.  The things I've created will be his to use or destroy.  But mostly, how much love we poured into our children will result in good people.  And good people will not burn down our world.

“Unbeing dead isn't being alive.”― E.E. Cummings

As a father who took being a parent seriously, I realize many things about my existence that others might not.  Life is not easy.  Our children are the sum total of love, life experiences, and their own gifts and talents.

I am not worried about being cosmic dust or living eternally.  I am worried that my children will live in a burning world due to others.  So I have tried to make my son aware of the world all around us.   And I've begged God to bless his life and his children.

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

The darkest journey

I have always been told that I am a pessimist.  This isn't true, but I am always told that I am too dark.  I write only about dark things and that I should be cheerful.  Well, I won't say I am happy overall, I am too sick for that, but I am happy for a number of different things.  I can say that as for a world view I try to think the best of others, and it is only that I am so often let down that I am depressed.  It is a struggle.

I do not see things as negative, nor do I assume the worst in people.

I found Him in the shining of the stars,
I marked Him in the flowering of His fields,
But in His ways with men I find Him not.
I waged His wars, and now I pass and die.

Idylls of the King (1856–1885) by Alfred, Lord Tennyson, The Passing of Arthur

But here are some things I love, that you might not know.

I love babies.
I love cats.
I love art.
I love Pre-Raphaelite art.
I love Picasso.
I love art museums.
I love poetry.
I love monsters like Godzilla and King Kong.
I love Akira Kurosawa movies.
Black and white films make me smile.
I love Duluth, Minnesota.
I love winter for the beauty, but not for the temps.
I "love" Siobhan Fahey, Sade, Elizabeth Taylor, Brigitte Bardot, and love my wife Beth.
I love the concept of honor, and morally find myself enamored of people and ideologies that are also involved in honor.
I love Peter Sellers, Jonathan Winters, The Marx Brothers, the Three Stooges and Laurel and Hardy.
I love bubble baths.
I love books.
I love bookstores.
I love authors.
I love comic books.
I love artists.
I love sushi.
I love Japan.
I love Samurai.
I love Sumo.
I love Canada, the UK, Greece, USA.
I love Diet Mountain Dew.
I love Sapporo beer.
I love Irish Whiskey, Bushmills particularly.
I love Vodka, Stolichnaya particularly.
I love a variety of genres of music.
I love Cat Stevens, Gregg Alexander, Amy Winehouse, Dusty Springfield.
I love Blue October, The Smiths, The Clash, The Smashing Pumpkins.

RECENTLY I've listened to:

I recently read:

I plan to watch:

These are my favorite Video Games:

Friday, July 7, 2017

Responses to Email Questions

I received almost a dozen emails last week asking questions that I get asked often.

Two people sent nearly identical emails that said this:

Your poetry speaks to my soul, I feel like I've known you forever.  I've sent you my pics, why don't you want to talk to me?

I am married, I write poems for the sole expression of my views, my creativity and to grow in my work.  I do not reply any longer to people sending erotic photos.  Whatever you look like, whatever you might say, no matter what you do, I cannot reply in kind, in spirit, in expectation of anything.  I sell my work, I write for free on my poetry blog, of 1800+ poems, and I am available with a public email address specifically to sell my work and advance my poetry.  I might think you are beautiful, I might be flattered, but I can do nothing in reply.


I received a few questions regarding my likes and interests.  I will focus here upon my poetry interests.

More than just your favorite poets, who is your favorite, what poem by them is your favorite, and what book is the best collection of their work?

Five favorite poets... I love the work of many, and not all of them are represented by being in print.

Ezra Pound   ---------------------   "In a Station of the Metro" 
William Carlos Williams ------    "This Is Just To Say"
E.E. Cummings -----------------     "in Just-"
Ovid of Rome -------------------     "In Summer's Heat"
Lord Byron     -------------------      "She Walks in Beauty"

How dare you not vote in 2016's election?  Why do you feel aloof from being a citizen of the US?  You get all the benefits, and you choose to do the one thing it asks?

 Kiss my rosie white hairy fat ass.

I have every right that you say, but that includes refusing to participate in the election due to disagreement with government or our choice for governance.  If you think we all must vote regardless,  you are a fool.  I am not a pragmatist, I am an idealist.  I refuse to apologize for being different than you in regards to what our duty is.  Duty, to me, is to not vote if either choice offered is the equivalent of societal chaos or failure.

What sports do you like?  

Already answered prior, but Hockey, NFL, Baseball.  I enjoy Sumo, UFC and Boxing as well.

Have you traveled the US and beyond?

I left the US to visit Canada numerous times, and to Mexico once.  I've enjoyed visiting the variety of the states I've seen.  But, I am an unusually unhappy camper.  I  have social anxiety, I have a guts system that leads to diarrhea when I travel, and, I hate being caught in traffic.

As a historian what era moves you the most?  What books regarding are the best?

I am moved by the experience of the Greeks versus the Persians.  Ancient Greeks in battle are always interesting to me.  I am moved by Japan's medieval era as well.

Is Trump the worst president ever?  

Oh hell no.  There are so many better candidates.  OK not so many.  I'd say.

But, here are some stinkers...

James Buchanan
Franklin Pierce
Warren G. Harding

LBJ might surprise some, but I think he was an idiot to declare war on poverty while ramping up the war in Vietnam.  Do one or the other, or do one and then do the other.  Doing both truly punished the US economy.  And, set a system of pay outs for the future, which also could not be paid in full.  I think it isn't wrong to fight poverty, or racism, or anything like that, I just know that the character of LBJ was such that he wasn't fighting those things.  He meant to buy the votes of those receiving the benefits.  Rightly or wrongly, I think he sucked.

Monday, July 3, 2017

Hockey Post

I used to blog about Hockey.  But going alone was difficult.  So I deleted it.  But since this blog is about all things me, I thought I'd post a look at an NHL list of my favorite players.  Most are Euros, but I don't choose favorites from a list of best or certain nationality players.

If you are wondering...

Lithuania 1
Latvia 2
Canada 7
Russia 6
Ukraine 1
Northern Ireland 1
Finland 2
Czech Republic 1
Sweden 1




Saturday, July 1, 2017

Awareness of race is not racism, awareness of abuse doesn't make you an abuser

There is a tendency of people in the present to judge you for what you are entertained by.  I am not
sure that is fair, because I think the reader is well able to discern right from wrong, and not be "recruited" into different world views due to fiction.

I've heard many people say that Robert E. Howard was racist.  They read his stories and see the black man, the yellow man, the white man.  Those are terms for race within the human species.  But Robert E. Howard identified with the barbarian.  He believed that the various races had qualities and talents, and he never made a whole race wrong for an act or beliefs stated by a single person of that race.  He believed that we were different, but he did not say, the one was better than the other.  Only in the area of civilized society versus barbarian society, where he clearly believed that the barbarian was honest if not polite, and the civilized person was polite, but not necessarily honest. 

I've heard similar comments about the women in RE Howard's works.  And I think that is a load of crap as well.  He was a male, and wrote women from a perspective that might not have been true, but it for certain was not one of women are less than men.  Conan's days with Belit of the Black Coast saw him as subordinate to a queen pirate.  The various women his heroes rescued, if they did were not lesser for being rescued, but needing help.  I am not blind to sexism, but most people see it in the case of Robert E. Howard, where it does not exist.

On the other hand... John Norman, author of Gor wrote, and still writes a series of books featuring the counter Earth planet GOR.  The world itself is an analogue for our world, only Gor is trapped in permanent dark ages due to certain intrigues by people in the shadows.  The story begins with an educated man being swept away to this counter Earth.  There, the man of letters and intellect is forced to become a warrior, and encounters a world where the only laws are the survival of the fittest, and men are superior to women.  I am not going to argue that John Norman isn't a sexist or anything of the sort.  But I don't think if a person reads the stories that it means they are in favor of evil or bestial behavior.  And, honestly, and this might not go over well, I think that if John Norman had written the same story with men subservient to women, it wouldn't have sold as well, and it would not have been controversial.   I read the first half of the books of the series.  I get weird looks when I acknowledge that I have read them.  But I am not, by any means a sexist.  My wife is the bread winner, I love women, I treat them with respect, and I think they are awesome.  As a general thing, that is.

But I want to say, beginning the series you are able to carry on innocent fantasy, but by book 10 or 12, the enslavement of the women is so obvious it is hard to deny.  As such, the more it seemed to revel in the darkness and gender inequity, the less I was able to enjoy the imaginary world I was viewing.  By the book 12 of the series I said wow, I just read the last of the books I will read of this series.  John Norman is not known to be a bully or asshole in person.  He had a long marriage and children.  And he taught philosophy in college for a very long time.  In other words, I don't think he necessarily enjoyed the concept, but was using it as the dominant world system.  Or maybe he did.  I don't know, but just by reading it I do not automatically become a sexist, or a racist, or anything.  I'd didn't join the fucking empire after watching Star Wars, damn it.