I watch hours of surgery videos on youtube. I think I do because I've always had a yearning to know everything about my body, and I am fascinated seeing the images that could be my very own viscera. Would mine be so diseased or wounded? Could I endure this painful procedure? I don't know. But I do know that the poet looks into spiritual and emotional portions of humanity, and the viscera contains our foul humors.
Why do I do it?
I don't know.
I confess I shall never get sick or faint from the sight of blood, or from seeing things that would make some people scream. I know I am not a sadist, and if a masochist only in the mental self abuse that a creative person goes through, and all INFJ's go through. So while I've become quite immune to feeling ill over seeing an exposed liver, or the removal of an appendix that has burst, I remain full of sorrow to hear someone's broken heart is breaking.